Life of a Late-Diagnosed Autistic Woman – From Deep Trauma and Violence to a Fulfilling Life
What happens when someone spends their entire life feeling different, without knowing why—until adulthood? This is the story of many people diagnosed late with autism, including Eva.
Let me introduce Eva Halamová, a 34-year-old woman from Czechia. At first glance, she captures attention with her striking appearance: her clothing and jewelry seem to come from another era, giving her an almost regal, vintage look. But few would guess the hardships this elegant woman has had to endure.
Eva is one of many autistic women who received their diagnosis later in life, at the age of 25. Late-diagnosed individuals often face immense challenges, misunderstandings, and a lack of support simply because their needs were never properly recognized.
“I always felt different.”
Eva, when did you first begin to sense that you were different from others?
I first became aware of it in kindergarten. I didn’t want to participate in group games we were all supposed to play; I preferred drawing. I also wanted to make friends, but I just didn’t know how.
When and how did you finally receive an official diagnosis?
I wasn’t diagnosed until I was 25. Before that, psychologists didn’t know what was “wrong” with me. I was even misdiagnosed with borderline personality disorder and schizoid personality disorder, which is nonsense; those two diagnoses contradict each other.
A Life Full of Struggles
Did your autism cause difficulties in your life?
Yes, I’ve faced misunderstanding and rejection my whole life, including from my family. The worst was my father, who had wanted a son, but instead got a daughter who was different. He made it very clear he saw me as broken or defective. He constantly told me I wasn’t what he wanted.
One day, that toxic behavior turned into physical violence. He hit me just because I didn’t immediately unload the dishwasher. The injury was serious; I had to go to the hospital to get a splint. After that, I’d had enough. I never came home from the hospital. I decided to live on my own.
I struggled with poverty and unstable housing. I was nearly homeless at times, staying in asylum houses or shared flats. As an autistic person, this lifestyle was extremely hard to cope with.
The Search for Stability
Did you have trouble finding work as well?
Definitely, I had to drop out of my studies and find a job, but it was nearly impossible. I didn’t yet know I was autistic, so I had no idea why everything was so difficult. Why couldn’t I manage things that seemed easy for others? Because of that, I ended up in a toxic relationship. I moved in with a man in a small town on the edge of the country. I stayed there for 12 years in a relationship full of manipulation and emotional blackmail.
A New Beginning
How is your life now?
So much better. Now I live near Prague and have a relationship with a man who is also autistic, and I feel like he’s the right one for me.
I’ve finally started pursuing my passion: sewing historical costumes. I’m especially in love with Baroque fashion: its ornate, decorative style speaks to me. I’ve learned how to sew Baroque clothing, and I’m now trying to start a business focused on historical, Gothic, and aristocratic fashion. This is my fashion brand, Sheila Venianetta. I really enjoy creating historic clothes, and my big dream is to be successful in what I am doing.
Fingers crossed that it works out!
Would you like to share your story?
As part of the ACTIVATE Autism Awareness campaign, we are collecting stories from young Autistic people like Eva. It can be visual, audio, or written. Get in touch with any story or question: just email it to activate@eucap.eu with a subject “My Autism Journey”